Edit: “getting closer to marriage” is about the whole journey starting from being completely single
Edit: if this shower thought is too confusing to be useful to you, then here is a quote that gives some of the same guidance, is simpler, less philosophical, but less broad: “Don’t waste your time chasing butterflies. Mend your garden, and the butterflies will come” - Mario Quintana
The narrow view you’re talking about is bad for success in dating, so it’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about things like working on yourself, having your own life, being an interesting person, becoming more confident, etc.
These are all things you can do when you’re single. Likewise there are plenty of married people with families who never accomplish these goals. Your need to connect everything to this arbitrary end goal of “starting a family” is what doesn’t make any sense. You keep trying to make an objective concrete declaration about things that are entirely subjective and really have no specific “correct” answer.
My idea might make more sense if you don’t think of it as being connected to intentions. Also, it fails to describe what comes after marriage is reached.
With that being said, I am not totally certain of how true my idea is.